Scratch That

On the name and personhood of Chris Dear Chris, Y our name may not, in fact, be Chris. I am aware of this and will resolve the uncertainty next time I see you in person, either by ascertaining your real name (which may very well be Chris, but is also likely not to be), or begin calling you Chris aloud until you stop me (if your name so happens to be non-Chris). Another fine and dandy solution entails establishing that your name is not Chris, then retaining the moniker Chris as a pseudonym to protect your identity from all three readers of my blog. To those unfamiliar with the person who may or may not be Chris, I have known him for approximately two weeks. We are classmates and engage in riotous and intense discussion. Some topics include: ontology, skepticism, God, misogyny, Machiavelli, government function, morality. My favorite assertion to date: “You can’t have a house without a house.” I’ll keep you posted on more quality Chris quotes taken out of context. On the nat

 If the font is weird, please ignore, I couldn't find out how to fix it. If it's normal, then fixed. Hello dear readership, friends, and loved ones. A lot has changed since you and I talked (or I talked and you, graciously, listened.) I'm not writing to reveal any new and half-baked blogging projects, just to put my thoughts down on the virtual page. Allow me to set the scene. Having just finished the latest in a long lineage of ill-fated clementines, I  listen to lofi music on Spotify and revel in solitude. You're here, of course, and so is my dog (who likes clementines, I discovered today) but my family is sequestered by a half-closed door and good headphones. A quick list of changes in my life to give context. I am eating plant based food and feel much better (vegan except honey, beeswax, and used leather/wool, if we're getting precise) . I am taking varied courses; diff eq, world lit, and hiking soften the sharpness of pure STEM that was my last semester.

I'd like to address a few topics in this post: a series of epic stature written by the brilliant and absolutely crazy Stephen King, my own (comparatively paltry) writing life, and a suggestion to my fellow literary enthusiasts. The Dark Tower I've been savoring The Dark Tower series over the past year or two. It boasts a total of 1,334,631 words (according to our helpful pal, Wikipedia) and uses them well, weaving a tale that spans worlds, realms, times, lives, and the enormous, tumultuous reach of good and evil. The story intrigues, amazes, and dumbfounds me, and references a diverse string of other creative works: WB Yeats' and Robert Browning's poems, the Marvel Universe, the Wizard of Oz, King's own writing, the book of Revelation. King usually writes in the genre of horror, yet while there are twisted monsters and demons, I see this story as a darker version of the Lord of the Rings trilogy. A word of caution: dark and mature themes regularly appear.

Hey everyone! It's been forever since posting and so much has happened in my life. Rather than recording every life event in an unceasing torrent, treating this as a diary, I'll instead explain my life's issues and events as they become relevant. You're welcome. I've quite recently rediscovered that I need to write in order to maintain any claim to the term sane . My journal is filled with inner musings and analyses of problems and most of all, prayers, but I want to open this blog back up as a place for my thoughts to require coherent explanations. I especially want to conduct book reviews, so I and therapy sessions, where I splay my feelings and whims on a virtual sheet of paper and, in writing them, bring them to some sort of order. I doubt I will get a regular schedule down, but I do want to write on here a lot. There are a few topics I want to share such as YXL Horn Creek and the impactful memoir/novel Dandelion Wine. But not tonight. In all things, God

This isn't the first list I've had on here. Do I care? A bit. Enough to edit previous lists to demonstrate, in their titles, that they do, in fact, precede this one? Nope. Hello, and welcome to my blog, occasional whirlpool of laziness, ignorance, and existential crises.  Like many other people, I have periodic emotional/existential calamity, in which the main issue, that grim problem from which all the other problems stem, is:  1. Not knowing what is wrong, and  2. Having the frantic need to do something about it... EVEN though you don't know what "it" is The episode is usually followed by Why was that such a big deal? You didn't need to overreact so much...  This situation invariably repeats itself. And we humans, or really, most living things, will invariably learn from repetition.  Yesterday I trekked with my energy beast  dog to a very green (important) location and composed this list in actual-pen-and-paper fashion (also important).

I don't remember writing this, but I know You were watching over my shoulder, Love.  ... speak to me, Lord,  and give me ears. feed me,  and grant me guts. heal me. be my lungs my air my water my thirst, my humility. show me what it is to love well. i hope this isn't just a sentiment, but really, You're the one who transforms  nothing  into  everything. i'm not trying to be mad at You, but You're perfect, and i'm not, and i'm feeling it. maybe this is just me being emotional again  but i want to  come home and be not trying to be  mad at you  while i see you. don't let me be uptight, PLEASE. teach me Your perspective:  help me see in hearts, not hours in minds, not minutes, souls, not seconds. cut to the quickest.